There she stood in the back of the room. From where I stood she seemed to be trying to press herself into the wall. From time to time she would look over at me, and then quickly avert her gaze.
When all but her and I remained in the room, she began to make her way over to me. And as she approached, I knew this beautifully dressed young woman was about to teach me something profound. She shared with me her ordeal of living in the shelter for the last 1.5 years because of domestic violence – it wasn’t safe for her to live alone. I am not sure when or why I formed the belief that women in shelters were destitute, and lacked education. Clearly this fractured and fragmented belief was not true. I can safely say it was not a judgment, but a lack of knowledge and understanding that socioeconomic factors such as education and income were, in fact, irrelevant. I was both caught off guard and embarrassed – how had I not known this?
As I listened to her story, my heart ached this young woman had lived through such trauma. She shared with me that she thought (at long last!) that she would be the one in her family to break the cycle. After all, she was highly educated, and was far from destitute. And yet she, like her mother and her mother’s mother, had married “wrong”.
It was later that night that I declared to my team that we had to get Frock Off: Living Undisguised into shelters to give hope and inspiration – to prove that we can stand on our stories, not in them. To break the abuse legacy. Thus 12 for 12 was born.
I am happy to report she did reclaim her life, find genuine and lasting love, and lives a life she once longed to live but didn’t think possible. She has broken the cycle. Was it easy for her? Hell NO! But she did it!
Sometimes we need to tear it all down to make it whole again, and if you find yourself there right now, please know you aren’t alone. We are here!
What’s Your Ace?
